Specialty · depression
Depression therapy in California
Depression rarely announces itself. More often the color drains out of ordinary days so gradually that you only notice when something you used to love feels like a chore. Sleep changes, energy thins, and the future starts to look flat. I work with depression steadily and without hurry, and I work with the whole person who is living inside it, not only with the symptoms.
Telehealth only, by secure video or audio, for people physically located in California. Laurie, LMFT.
What depression work looks like with me
Many of the people I see with depression are capable, conscientious and used to handling things. That can make depression especially confusing, because the usual tools, trying harder, thinking positively, pushing through, stop working. Nothing is wrong with your character. Depression is a state your whole system has entered, often for understandable reasons, and states can change.
We begin by getting curious rather than critical. What were the months before this like? What losses, strains or long stretches of carrying everyone else came first? Depression often sits on top of grief that was never given room, on top of trauma, or on top of a life that slowly drifted away from what matters to you. Understanding its roots does not fix it by itself, but it takes away the shame of not knowing why.
Then we work on two levels at once. On one level we tend to the daily basics that depression erodes: rhythm, sleep, movement, contact with other people, small commitments you can actually keep. On the other level we go after what keeps the heaviness in place: the harsh inner voice, the belief that nothing will change, the parts of you that learned to go numb because feeling was too much. Relief tends to come in small increments before it comes in larger ones, and I will point out the increments, because depression is very good at hiding them.
The aim is not only that the heaviness lifts. It is that you find your way back to peace, joy, purpose and fulfillment in your relationship to life, to yourself, to the people you love, and to whatever you understand as greater than yourself, in your own words.
Depression is not a verdict on who you are.
Small, true steps count, especially on the days they are all you have.
Depression can look like many different things
Flatness rather than sadness
Not tears, just nothing. Food tastes of less, music does not land, and you go through the motions well enough that no one notices. This is one of the most common forms, and one of the most overlooked.
Exhaustion that sleep does not fix
Waking tired, dragging through the afternoon, and being unable to rest at night. Depression often lives in the body as much as in the mind, and we work with both.
A harsh inner critic
A voice that narrates your failures and discounts every success. We do not argue with it forever. We get to know it, find out what it thinks it is protecting, and give you another voice to answer it with.
Depression after a loss or change
A death, a divorce, a retirement, an illness, a move. Sometimes depression is grief that has had nowhere to go. When it is, we give the grief its own room.
Low mood that has lasted years
Some people cannot remember feeling otherwise and have come to think this is simply their personality. Often it is not. Long patterns take patient work, and they can shift.
How we would work
We start with a free 20-minute consult by phone, text or video. You tell me what the last months have been like, in as much or as little detail as you want, and I tell you honestly whether I think I can help. There is no pressure in that call and no obligation afterward.
If we go ahead, sessions are weekly to begin with, by secure video or audio anywhere in California. Depression makes getting anywhere harder, so meeting from your own room is a real advantage. I draw on what fits you: Acceptance and Commitment Therapy to move toward what matters even while the mood is low, CBT to examine the thoughts that keep the heaviness in place, Internal Family Systems for the parts of you that shut down or push too hard, somatic and mindfulness work for a body that has gone quiet, and my own Positive Re-Narrative and Repatterning to build new patterns that last.
- Persistent low mood, flatness or emptiness
- Loss of interest in things you used to love
- Depression alongside grief, anxiety or trauma
- Burnout that has turned into something heavier
- Depression during a major life transition
- A harsh inner critic and chronic self-doubt
- Feeling disconnected from meaning, purpose or faith
Questions people ask about depression
- How do I know if this is depression or just a hard stretch?
- Sometimes the honest answer is that it does not matter much at the start. If low mood, flatness or exhaustion has lasted more than a couple of weeks and is getting in the way of your work, your relationships or your enjoyment of life, it is worth talking to someone, whatever we end up calling it. In the consult we can talk about what you are noticing, and in the first sessions I will share how I understand it, in plain language.
- Can therapy for depression really work over video?
- Yes. For many people it is easier, because depression makes leaving the house, driving and sitting in a waiting room feel like a mountain. You can meet from your own chair, and on the hardest days we can use audio only. What matters most is the relationship and the consistency of the work, and both travel well over a screen.
- What if I have tried therapy before and it did not help?
- That is common, and it is useful information rather than a reason to give up. Tell me what you tried and what was missing. Sometimes the approach did not fit, sometimes the timing was wrong, and sometimes the work stayed at the level of talking about the depression rather than changing the patterns under it. I work integratively, so we can choose a different route rather than repeating the same one.
- What if I am having thoughts of not wanting to be alive?
- Please tell someone today. If you are in danger or thinking about ending your life, call or text 988 to reach the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline, or call 911. I am not a crisis service and I do not monitor messages around the clock, so please do not wait for a reply from me. When things are steadier, therapy is a good place to talk about those thoughts openly, without judgment.
You do not have to feel better to begin
Depression often tells people to wait until they have more energy before reaching out. You do not need to. Text or email and we will find a time to talk, and you can keep that first conversation as short as you like. Telehealth only, by secure video or audio, for people physically located in California. Laurie, LMFT.